Working to Live

Puerto Rico changed me.

I love that my work has taken me to such incredible places: Spain, Greece, Australia, New Zealand, China, Dubai, and so many amazing cities across the United States. Recently, I had the opportunity to work in Puerto Rico. I returned a different person.

I help produce large scale trade events (conventions, mostly) and the work can be tough. Long hours... 12-hour+ days are typical. During move-in, exhibit halls are wide open to the elements so they are often very hot or very cold. A common day will average 25,000 steps. Everything can be on fire all at once. And you'll have about 10,000 conversations and make twice as many decisions every day (for an introvert, this is taxing). I love the work, though. I truly do.

Thing is, as I've gotten older, I've realized that I have to invest in my physical well being in order to complete an entire event (generally 7-10 days). That means saying "no" to a lot of extracurricular activities, guarding my sleep, and basically living to work. If I don't, my performance can be compromised. My mood definitely will be. And I don't like that feeling. I love being good at what I do.

However, all my "rules" went out the window the second I checked into my assigned hotel room in Puerto Rico. I arrived close to midnight and had to practically shout to the front desk agent because of the pumping live music in the lobby (it was a Thursday). I made my way through a sea of tropically-clad revelers to the guest room elevators. Once inside my room (badly in need of refurbishment), I immediately opened the sliding glass door leading to the balcony. From there, I could not see a thing because of the dark night skies. But I could hear the ocean waves crashing into the shore beneath me. I had been awake since 2am my time (nearly 20 hours) and had my first meeting at 6:30am (3:30am my time) the following morning. But, I still couldn't wait to wake up and see the sunrise and the ocean. I kept my curtains open so I wouldn't miss a bit of daylight.

Almost instantly upon arriving in Puerto Rico, I knew I was in a special place. All I could think was that I wanted to make the most of it. From the noise levels in the lobby and hallways, I could tell everyone was feeling extra alive. I wanted that, too.

I was really fortunate that our first work day only took about 10 hours. We were super motivated to get out to the hotel pool and private beach before sunset, so we worked our butts off to make it happen. I was exhausted. But, I followed the lead of my sweet colleague and changed into my swimsuit like Clark Kent changes into Superman. We had dropped our work gear and clothes and gotten into our poolside outfits in 10 minutes flat. I don't think an entire 20 minutes passed from the time our Uber dropped us back at the hotel until we were at the pool bar ordering our first round. Efficiency!

That first night was truly bliss. We sat by the pool. Made our way to the beach. Floated in the ocean. Ate and drank poolside. Watched the sunset. And welcomed the rest of our team to San Juan. I felt truly happy. Truly joyful. For the first time since my Dad had passed two months earlier, I felt like there was so much more life to live.

Vitamin Sea is a panacea for all sorts of ailments. But it wasn't just the coastal location and natural beauty of Puerto Rico that grabbed my heart. It was the people. Puerto Ricans are stunning inside and out. They're gorgeous, friendly, hard working, and joyful. They also seem to live their lives fully. We took a dance class on a Monday night at a locals' club. It was packed. We went out for dinner and drinks on a Sunday night in a nightlife district. It was bustling with local partiers. I went to a cemetery early on a Saturday morning to honor my Dad on his birthday. I saw neighborhood sidewalks overflowing with joggers and vendors and strolling families. Everywhere we went- which was mostly outside of tourist areas- we could feel the joy in our souls.

Puerto Ricans love community, family, food, music, nature, and their strong culture. They prioritize these over everything. They don't live to serve work. They work so they can support the full lives they love. Their hallmarks:

• People over productivity

• Presence over performance

• Life over labor

These are things a lot of people like to say, but they seldom walk the walk. Puerto Ricans have these values ingrained in their everyday lives and culture. They're doing it right.

It would be easy to say that Puerto Ricans can be happy because they live in what many would consider to be paradise. Especially if you've only visited the tourist spots. But their lives are far from easy. Wages are low. Infrastructure is failing in many areas (shortages of potable water and electricity abound). They are vulnerable to hurricanes and floods and don't receive the same disaster relief as mainland states. They are still fighting for a culture that colonizers have tried to erase over many centuries. And they are not even treated- or have the same benefits- as other American citizens. We made Puerto Rico a territory without their consent and are threatening to strip its people of birthright citizenship. They cannot vote in our presidential elections, but they have fought alongside our military in countless wars. They must pay the same FICA taxes as workers on the mainland, but are not eligible for SSI (Supplemental Security Income). They've even witnessed our leaders allowing their beautiful home to be called "a floating island of garbage" and lumped into a category of "shithole countries."

Despite all of this, Puerto Ricans are among the richest and loveliest people I've ever encountered on this earth. Because they get it. They get that we are here to live. Maybe that means coming into your early morning meeting a little tired. Maybe that means enjoying every single hour of your Sunday without thinking about (or preparing for) Monday. Maybe that means letting the laundry or dishes pile up a bit. Maybe that means putting your phone away during your time off. If you're hanging out with your people, you probably don't need to be dealing with work emails. I'm sorry, but we really aren't as important as we pretend to be. Right?

Lives are not at stake with what most of us do. So why are we so willing to compromise the quality of our own in service of our jobs? Paychecks are great. They're necessary. Doing well at work is great. It's laudable to have a strong work ethic, do your best, and even to love your profession. But, too many of us are living to work. We love to say, "Work hard, play hard." But when was the last time you actually played... hard? So hard that you left work far behind you? Last year for your one-week vacation? Did you still check emails while you were away? Talk about work? Worry about work? I'm guilty as charged on all counts.

Puerto Rico helped me see that I've gotten the work life balance thing way wrong for most of my adult life. That changed me. Since returning home, I've let more emails wait till the next morning to be answered. I've gotten into water almost every day (mostly at night after work so I can relive my Puerto Rico evenings... although, our above ground isn't quite giving seaside resort :-)). I've danced a whole lot more. And I've let more of my life spill into my work as opposed to the other way around.

I've often heard people my age criticize younger generations over their work ethic. Honestly, I think the young ones are onto something. They recognize that we have antiquated systems intended to squeeze every last drop out of workers to maximize profit. We've cosigned those systems- along with their brutal expectations- because we wrongly believe that our productivity is more important than our personal lives. Look at maternity/parental leave in the United States versus a country like Canada. We say we value family life, but we don't really put our money where our mouth is. I believe it's high time for all of this to change and I hope the next generations make it happen.

A few years ago, my husband and I were in Greece. (Work trip that we parlayed into a vacation). We took a steep hike up to a lighthouse, navigated sketchy concrete steps along cliff sides, and rode ATVs through busy and bustling streets. It was amazing.

At one point I said to him, "Babe, we aren't going to be able to enjoy traveling like this when our bodies are 20 years older." He agreed. We can't postpone enjoying our lives until we've worked ourselves into old age and exhaustion. Working to live later is almost as bad as living to work.

So, now that I've brought Puerto Rico home with me in my heart, I am trying to work to live. It doesn't require a fancy vacation. It doesn't require a lot of money. It just requires a mindset that we should enjoy our time off. We should appreciate and make the most of what we've worked so hard to have. We should hit the town on a Monday night without worrying about Tuesday morning. We should chase sunrises and sunsets. We should get in the water every chance we have. We should eat good food and laugh with our people while our smart phones are left in other rooms. We should immerse ourselves in other cultures so we can learn and grow from them. And we should never stop moving because we don't want our lives to think we're done with them. We're definitely not!

Tomalo con calma. And... siestas over deadlines!

Xoxo,

B

P.S. If you have a moment, please pray for Puerto Rico. If you have a chance, please visit the island. If you see a good Zillow listing in San Juan, let me know. ;-)